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#311
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A fireman is polishing his fire engine outside the fire station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red cart with little ladders hung on the side and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.
The little girl is wearing a fireman's helmet and has the cart tied to a dog and a cat. The fire-fighter walks over to take a closer look: 'That's a lovely fire engine,' he says admiringly. 'Thanks,' says the little girl. The fireman looks closer and notices the little girl has tied one of the cart's strings to the dog's collar and one to the cat's testicles. 'Little colleague,' says the fire-fighter, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your fire engine, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could probably go a lot faster.' The little girl pauses for a moment, looks at the wagon, at the dog and at the cat, then shyly looks into the fireman's eyes and says: 'You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a f****** siren, would I?'
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[COLOR="Blue"]If anyone needs T.I.G or M.I.G or small custom fabrication jobs done PM me.[/COLOR] |
#312
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#313
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During a project on "The Sea." kids from various classes were asked to
draw pictures or write about their experiences. Teachers got together to compare the results and put together some of the comments. 1. This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6) 2. Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves to chargers. (Christopher age 7) 3. Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6) 4. If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all around you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7) 5. I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6) 6. A dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of it's head. Billy age 7. My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs. (Millie age 6) 8. When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William age 7) 9. I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6) 10. When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin age 6) |
#314
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Quote:
http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/langu...es/005189.html
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No more GC8, sad face. [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Last edited by phizzle; 04-08-2008 at 06:48 PM. |
#315
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Q:whats the difference between jam and marmalade
A:you cant marmalade your dick up your wifes ass!! |
#316
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#317
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Two Irishmen are walking through a forest. They see a sign that said 'Tree Fellas Wanted'.
Paddy turns to Mick and says "Mick, if Sean was here we could of got the job!"
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MY99 - Powered by Autronic, tuned by Race Torque. www.racetorque.com.au www.anytimetowing.com.au |
#318
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What does West Coast Eagle Quentin Lynch and Michael Jackson have in common?
BOTH WEAR GLOVES FOR NO APPARENT REASON!
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MY99 - Powered by Autronic, tuned by Race Torque. www.racetorque.com.au www.anytimetowing.com.au |
#319
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Quote:
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No more GC8, sad face. [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] |
#320
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A Northern Territory farm hand (An Aboriginal) radios back to the farm manager.
'Boss, I gotta helluva problem here. I hit a pig with the Ute. The pig's OK, but he's stuck in the bullbars at the front of my Ute and is wriggling and squealing so much I can't get him out.' The manager says,'Ok, there's a ...303Rifle behind the seat. Take it; shoot the pig in the head and you'll be able to remove him.' Five minutes later the farm hand calls back, 'I did what you said boss. Took the 303, shot the pig in the head and removed him from the bull-bars. No problem there, but I still can't go on'. 'Now what's the problem?' raged the Manager. 'Well boss, it's his motor-bike. The flashing blue light is stuck under the right-front wheel arch.' '... You there Boss? |
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10101010100101010001111100111, joke, my cats name is mittens, p-wrx is gay as 2 dicks touching, penis, perth, wrxpost |
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